don’t complicate the journey

three weeks in. three weeks into this sojourn and. three weeks and a few days into this sojourn and Stillness finally said “you are making this more complicated than it needs to be.” let me back up to where i left off in my last blog post, “Disconnected.”

what is perspective?

after i left my West Highland Way (WHW) companions, it took a couple of days to exhale and expand into my own space again. my roommate was lovely. she would make a “cuppa” at the end of every day for both of us. we were both respectful of the space we shared and made a genuine connection (and are remaining in contact)—so perhaps my perception of connection needed to shift? what was i focusing on? at that point on the journey, my perceptions were more like a kaleidoscope shifting moment-by-moment. no wonder Stillness was waiting to offer insights.

time for contemplation

on my “sojourning with grief” in 2019 (see blogs posts from march-august 2019,) i stayed on the Isle of Mull and found my time there meaningful, so planned a return visit, but to a different side of the island where i would be a short ferry ride from the Isle of Iona, a well-known pilgrimage site. my BnB host was a kindred spirit—a poet! and she made a delicious breakfast each of my three mornings, eggs fresh from her chickens. i was isolated on this sparsely populated end of the isle. it was walk or take a rare bus. lots of time to be close to the land, be with my thoughts…and the constant wind. wind and Stillness seem like odd companions, but there is something about the way wind stirs movement in trees, across grass, water, moves clouds that shifted my inner need to “know” to an outer appreciation of beauty and the lesson that nature sways, flows, whirls with what is offered. a lesson acknowledged, though still absorbing.

wise ones hold space

my day on Iona included a hefty walk to St. Columba’s Bay and then a walk on the labyrinth, which is comprised of assorted rocks from the beach. built on uneven land where sheep graze (and leave droppings.) the path is narrow. easy to stumble. an apt metaphor for my Sojourn with Stillness at that point. the wise, ancient rock face that overlook the labyrinth and the waters off the rocky beach held the space with grace. the geological formation of Iona is ancient and complex. the wise beings that watch over this place know Stillness well…especially the rocks. in their way of being, they acknowledge my journey and offered affirmation. i was grateful.

Sorrow::Ocean::Stillness

my time on Mull was after the Uvalde shootings. walking to a beach on a gray day, i sent sorrow into the Ocean. sat and watched the waves caress the shore. slowly eroding the rocks. Ocean knows what to do with sorrow. is in dialog with Stillness. i listened.

time on the isles was nurture. slow wifi. slow pace. listening. slowly reconnecting.

Stillness’s gift

as the train from Oban (my “connection” point) to Glasgow rocked me back and forth, i saw the WHW path i had walked in the rain and wind, the sun now shining. a different perspective. i listened to Mirabai Starr share about the life of St. Teresa of Avila through tiny ear buds—how she discerned if her mystical messages where authentic or something out of her own imaginings::do they expand her love for God? expansion. expanding love. expanding awe. expanding connections. i rolled the word around in my mouth. my heart. e x p a n s i o n yes…it resonated. Stillness was offering it to me as a gift.

kindness at every turn

when i was on the train from Glasgow to Dumfries, the landscape shifted from Highland to Lowland. stark and rugged to lush and rolling. and the sky, the clouds where astonishing. the sky expanded before my eyes…and this after i saw ever expanding skies in Oban. Stillness is expanding my heart. my eyes. my capacity for wonder. to receive and offer kindness. my being. my connection to others.

now my time in Scotland has ended and i have just landed in Wales having spent last week in the Lowlands (Dumfries & Galloway.) kindness and generosity were extended to me over and over. i connected with people (locals, English, Americans, Germans.) a gift of sojourning solo::folks are willing to reach out. perhaps curious about the wanderer. i am starting to wonder if i am Sojourning with Stillness or with Kindness. maybe they are collaborating. did i get the purpose of this sojourn “wrong” at the outset? holding it even more loosely.

or is there more for Stillness to teach me on this sojourn? the journey continues for five more weeks. i plan to remain open to what Stillness & Kindness are offering and how i can share the gifts.

as always, i remain grateful for you. for your following along as i listen on this journey.

please continue to be kind and gentle to yourselves. and to others. it really does make a difference.

in gratitude,

anne

For Your Reflection

• How has kindness been extended to you as you go about your day? How do you extend kindness? How does it feel to receive kindness?

• What areas of your life would you like to see expand? Ability to wonder? Love? Receive? Give? Create? Be with others? Care for yourself? ?????

bonus

most of my reflections have been offered through my personal Facebook postings. my journal really. sharing the kindnesses offered. an interesting unfolding of this journey that is different than last time, which was grief focused as i returned my mother’s ashes along the way. let me offer you a few quotes:

• may 13 (glasgow) Hands down this is my favorite experience [of the day]: yesterday I heard a street musician, but had no change to offer. Today I did. I stopped and listened (most folks just toss a few coins in his box and walk on.) I asked if I could take his photo (yes.)

  He pointed his bow at me, wanting me to wait. Found the tune he was looking for. And then he played me a song I knew and always stirs my soul (My Farewell.) A gift.

• may 24 (on the train from glasgow to oban) …then partway through the journey an older English couple joined us [the woman i was sitting by] and you could have pulled them right out of a BritBox show. He reminded me of Wallace in Wallace and Grommet. They used the be “walkers” but were past those days. Their kindness was: train was running late and if I missed my connection [i didn’t], they gave me their number and said to call and they would give me a lift to Oban.

• may 26 (arriving on Mull via the ferry) Kindness alert!! The info center gals stowed my big suitcase for me [2 hour wait for the bus.] The coffee shop, which is short staffed so “no eating in” … allowed me to sit outside and slurp my soup, drink my coffee, and catch up on journaling. The rain held off until I was done eating/journaling (thank you rain.)

• may 27 (story from my host, an offering from the poets of Ross of Mull) As to stories: There’s kindness out of the pain of war. In 1940, the Arandora Star was carrying primarily Italian POW’s to Canada when a German U-boat torpedoed the ship. Some were rescued, many perished. An empty lifeboat washed up on a beach on Knockvologan Beach, Ross of Mull (the area where I am staying) and has been buried in the sand there along with its story. No one knew if anyone survived from the lifeboat. Alex, my host, along with other poets of this place, do an annual reading in honor of those who died. They stand in the shape of the lifeboat and read original poems. One year an Italian woman was visiting. She had no idea about the annual event, she just happened upon it. Her grandfather was one rescued from the lifeboat. She was deeply moved. The poets gave her copies of all the poems.

• may 31 (i’ll end on this, though there are more) …whimsy and noticing led to a wonderful connection. A red, wrought-iron fence with flowers reaching to the sky. Large trees! A sign that read, “The Usual Place.” A cozy park that beckoned: “all welcome.” So I entered. Walked the path around the outside saying “hello” to the trees. And there were new tree plantings in honor of deceased loved ones. The play area had swings and things that were for differently abled-bodies (like Harper’s Playground in the Pacific NW).

  And then a woman came over to me and said “Hello, would you like to join us,” pointing to a gathering by the covered area in the corner. I had noticed them, but assumed it was a private affair. “We have room, please.” The event was to support “carers,” the equivalent of family caregivers in America. They do something monthly and this month they were celebrating the Queen’s Jubilee. Oh it was fun! We played “pass the parcel” & lotto. I got to have a cream scone and tea and, this is so the Universe at work, besides meeting Lynn, the woman who invited me, I sat next to Jenny, a trustee. She is a nurse whose passion is working with dementia patients and their grief and does presentations and… (that’s the nutshell….there’s more, but will leave it at that.) Anyway I gave her my info and we have already exchanged emails.

  Oh, idea behind the park is to be inter-generational and inclusive. It is “Catherine Street Inclusive Play Park & Community Garden,” if you want to look it up for ideas.

  What a delightful team of heart-centered folks supporting carers, who have the same issues that unpaid caregivers have in the US—feeling isolated, lack of government support, not enough paid caregivers available, etc.

  Oh, and this is very special: everyone got to take home a goodie bag and inside was a Jubilee Celebration mug. I was going to decline (like I need that in my luggage) but how could I say no!

  So there: kindness in action, not only to me, but to children (the interactive park—the energy was marvelous,) to carers, to elders, to each other on the team. Truly a delightful and whimsical day. Oh, I almost forgot. The park has its own gull, Steven Seagull. The gull was injured and Lynn told me they made the mistake of feeding him last year, so now he stays in the park and won’t let any other gulls come near!

  Kindness…a healing balm for a troubled world.